Ten years ago, my mom and I were tying pieces of silky purple ribbon to the top of dozens of lovely wedding bulletins. It was a few weeks before my wedding, and she and I had had so much fun getting everything ready for the big day. After all the months of planning, it was starting to all come together.
But as she read over our order of service, I saw her frown.
“Are you sure you want to include confession and absolution in your wedding?” she asked.
My mother, an amazing woman of faith, understandably wondered if it was a bit of a downer to stand by my future husband, in front of all my loved ones, in the most beautiful dress I’d ever worn, on the most important day of my life, and say: “I, a poor miserable sinner …”
Amidst all the lace and candles and music and cake, we decided to include a bit of a reality check on our wedding day. Because even in our naïve twenty-two-year-old minds, my husband and I already knew we were sinners, and we’d undoubtedly sin against each other. We needed to build our marriage and our future family on a solid foundation of repentance and forgiveness in Jesus. Because despite the perfectly researched vacuum and coordinating towels on our registry, the wedding gift we needed most was grace.
Sin at Home
Maybe it’s just my experience, but it seems that people’s sinfulness is more apparent around the people they love than it is around strangers. In your own home, your guard is down. You’re not putting on a façade like you might do at work or church or school. You are completely yourself. And because yourself is both a saint and a sinner, well, both sides will likely come out.
When someone you don’t know very well is rude to you, you probably brush it off, and hopefully bite your tongue … most of the time. But when your loved one is rude to you … how dare they?! Can’t your spouse see how hard your day was? Can’t your kids respect you and just be grateful for once? Can’t your family member ever come through for you? Now you want to say something equally snippy back at them. And just like that, your home is one of after-school meltdowns, impatient responses, passive-aggressive texts, and so on.
Grace at Home
When you feel the weight of sin in your closest relationships, do as Paul instructed the Colossians:
Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. (Colossians 3:12–14)
Easier said than done. It’s hard to bear with loved ones when they sin against us. It’s hard to be humble and admit we have sinned against them. And it’s hard to be patient—especially as a parent, let’s be honest. But we can do all this only through the perfect compassion, patience, and love of Jesus, who forgives us all our sins and enables us to forgive others.
So whether it’s your wedding day or just a Tuesday, pray for God’s grace to enter into your home and your family. Forgive and ask forgiveness. “And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful” (Colossians 3:15).
Scripture: ESV®.
Download this month’s Everyday Faith Calendar, which focuses on God’s grace in familiar stories from the Old Testament. You will find short Bible readings and prayer prompts for each day.
